Trust

When he came to the door yesterday, I stuck out my hand and introduced myself. He stepped back and said he could not shake my hand. I instantly knew I had somehow offended and apologized. He said he was fasting. I must have still looked confused, because next he said, "It's Ramadan," like of course I would know that a person fasting during Ramadan would not or could not shake hands with me.

So, not knowing enough about Ramadan, perhaps I was at a disadvantage when we began to talk about price, but I did okay. I had a couple other guys coming for estimates later, so I just wanted a number to compare with the others. He saw it differently. He was very calm and unrushed, as though he could take it or leave it, but leaving seemed ridiculous to him. "You seem a reasonable person, I'm sure we can negotiate something. Call the others and tell them not to come. I brought my tools and I'm ready to start now." Well, I needed the yard cut before the party Saturday, so it did make sense, if we could agree on price. I finally got a starting number from him. I then threw out my number. Of course he went halfway, but I stuck. Finally he agreed, but with a couple of stipulations.

"Since we can't shake hands, go like this," he said smiling, and made a fist and brought it to his chest. I did it, and we had our deal.

He finished the front yard, then wanted us to go for the 15 bags of mulch he needed. As he was following me in his truck to get it I made him run a light. Worrying I may have caused him to sin during Ramadan, I wondered if he thought of his religion as I used to think of mine when I was practicing it--I always wanted to keep a clean slate, to keep the lines of communication open between me and God, I wanted to stay "in God's will," especially on a religious holiday. I hoped that if he worried about such things he'd blame the traffic light on my careless driving and not on himself.

When we got back to the house he began cutting and trimming in the backyard. He wasn't moving really fast or anything, but it was hot, so I asked him if he'd like some ice water. "It's Ramadan," he said again, obviously, as if I should of course know that fasting means fasting, even from water.

"Not even water?" I said. He shook his head. "Damn," I thought, "Christians at least allow themselves water when they're trying to deprive themselves...."

It grew hotter, and later, and although he'd agreed to take away all the clippings, he didn't have enough trash bags, and he'd used all the mulch on the backyard. I thought that he could have made it work, but regardless, now I needed five more bags of mulch, and he needed trash bags. He suggested he would come back this morning to spread the mulch I would provide, to finish the clean up and take away all the mess. He offered to leave one of his tools to show that he would show up, but, could he have the money--all of it, although the job was unfinished?

I said yes and not to leave anything, but told him my husband would say I should have withheld part of the money to ensure his return. He said, "Trust me."

I said "I will trust you, only because I don't like NOT trusting people. I don't like to live that way. I'll see you tomorrow, 8:30 am."

Kevin did comment on how trusting I was, and when he left this morning, he asked me to send him a message when the guy came back. It would save him texting me to ask because he would be wondering....

It's 10:00 am now, and I have five bags of mulch and a big pile of clippings in my yard.

I should have asked him to chest thump with me.