Day One

It's day one of my new writing life. Not really, I've been writing awhile. But it's the first day here, in this new city, in my new creative space, that I woke up, detoured only to make coffee, then marched down the hall to my desk to start writing. It's the plan for my life here--make writing the first and most important thing, rather than the thing I do if there is time left at the end of the day.

We've taken a month to get settled, and only Monday did I finish painting this room the warm colors I felt would help me find my silent voice. Yesterday was spent clearing obligations from my desk, then today, up and to the pen, journal and computer. Of course there were the ever-present distractions, email, a dog who wants walking, and even my husband was around this morning, and shouldn't I have breakfast with him? But I've decided what life here is going to look like, and I'm going to give it my best shot. Up to write in the mornings, work in the afternoons and evenings around people that will hopefully offset the intense introspection and discipline of the morning.

I've never done this--make some work of mine the most important thing and not let anything stop me from doing it. I know plenty of people who do it every day. They completely clear their life and everything falls behind the goals they set, and guess what, they achieve them! Instead I've always felt my way through life, making sure I was being real and right and taking care of those I loved, and then, maybe do a little work for someone else and then myself. Not bad, but I need to balance it out. It's a bit hard for me, I don't want to live my life like these people I see, who often end up after years of working to find they don't really know themselves, their families and have nothing left but their work. But I am consciously exercising my will and discipline to give my first few hours a day to this which I have always wondered about and desired to do, only with the full belief that it will not be a distraction from real life but a huge part of knowing myself and what really matters.

And I'm going to try really hard not to let anything stop me.